I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
