butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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