I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize