We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Too much gin, very little bucket
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
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She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
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Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real