Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
