The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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