out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Randomize
