The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.