girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I can't put those talents on a resume
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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