the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
