How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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