why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize