Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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