Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
