How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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