Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
