If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
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