I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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