Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize