maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
only you would photoshop your dick
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Houston, we have a squirter
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize