Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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