This girl is more easily done than said...
there's paper in my vomit.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Randomize
