so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize