I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
