five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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