hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
