I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
