I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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