Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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