dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
i think my cat just said my name.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
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