If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
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