I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
