I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
is this the sara with the beer cane?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
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