So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Randomize
