My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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