whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
