I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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