Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize