You're my little dorito
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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