ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
