I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I wear drunk well.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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