So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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