I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT