He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
false alarm, still single
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