I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
