she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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