Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
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He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
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I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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