ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
No I am not eating basil off your cock
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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