I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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