I wish I could teleport
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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