OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
