the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize