In the future we'll all be gay
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
